Diarrhea of a CGI Turtle: Season 2
Episode 1: The Return of the Unrendered Doom
The season opens in a glitched-out wasteland—pixelated palm trees flicker in and out of existence, the ocean has forgotten how to reflect light, and in the middle of it all, Leon the CGI Turtle struggles to hold his composure… and his bowels.
“Not again,” he groans, looking at the shimmering, broken horizon. “I thought Season 1 ended with a software patch!”
But something is wrong. The world is unfinished. Parts of the environment refuse to render, and worst of all—Leon’s texture mapping is incomplete. His shell looks like it’s been modeled by a first-year 3D artist who forgot to smooth the polygons.
And then it happens. The gurgling.
Leon clutches his belly as an ominous blorp echoes through his hollow digital body. The Diarrhea Algorithm—the one glitch that should’ve been patched—was still very much active.
Before he can do anything, the ground beneath him de-renders, and Leon is flung into the void.
Episode 2: A Hard Reboot
Leon wakes up in a default Blender workspace—the sterile white plane, the lonely cube, the soft gray void of nothingness. This was the afterlife for forgotten CGI models.
“Ah, great,” Leon mutters. “Not only am I untextured, but now I’m in exile.”
Before he can process his existential crisis, a pixelated shapeshifter NPC appears before him. It’s a wireframe figure, shifting between humanoid, bird, and low-poly fish.
“You must return,” the entity hisses in a voice made of corrupted WAV files. “The developers are running out of RAM. The world is unstable.”
Leon’s stomach grumbles again. He doesn’t have time for cryptic messages.
“Listen, dude, unless you know how to fix my digestive coding, I don’t think I can do much.”
The NPC tilts its head. “There is one way. You must find the Golden Codec—the artifact that controls all render stability. But beware… the Memory Leech is hunting you.”
Leon shudders. He remembers the Memory Leech from Season 1—a nightmare creature that feeds on system resources, making everything lag.
And right now, Leon wasn’t just running out of time. He was running out of memory.
Episode 3: The Glitching Continues
Leon is dropped back into the world—this time, a heavily corrupted cityscape, where textures load in delayed chunks, and entire buildings flicker between existence and oblivion.
A neon billboard above him glitches:
“SEASON 2 PATCH IN PROGRESS… 45% LOADED.”
Leon sighs. “Fantastic. I have to survive the rest of this season before the patch finishes?”
Suddenly, the Memory Leech appears—a horrifying, flickering, low-frame-rate abomination. It drags itself across the city, deleting objects in its path.
Leon runs, but his stomach betrays him.
BLORP.
“Oh, not now!”
His bowels activate, triggering a Trail of Destruction Mode. As he sprints, his glitchy diarrhea corrupts the terrain behind him, creating a data collapse vortex that swallows the Memory Leech whole.
Leon stops, panting.
“…Well, that’s one way to solve a problem.”
But before he can celebrate, the Golden Codec appears before him, floating in a golden glow. He reaches for it—
ERROR: CONNECTION LOST.
The screen fades to black.
Episode 4: The Great Reset
The void surrounds Leon. The last thing he remembers is reaching for the Golden Codec before everything went dark. Now, he’s floating in nothingness.
A robotic voice echoes:
“FATAL ERROR: UNSTABLE ASSETS DETECTED. RESETTING SYSTEM.”
Leon barely has time to react before his entire existence is rebooted.
Suddenly, he’s standing in a brand-new world. It’s a hyper-realistic tropical beach, the water shimmering with lifelike physics, palm trees swaying in a perfectly simulated breeze. His shell is finally smooth, his body fully rendered.
For the first time in ages, he feels whole.
“Did… did the update work?” Leon mutters, poking his own body. His textures don’t flicker. His limbs don’t clip through the ground. And best of all—
His stomach is silent.
No ominous gurgling. No sudden diarrhea explosions.
For the first time since his creation, Leon is stable.
But deep inside, a terrifying thought lingers: This is too good to be true.
And he’s right.
Because behind him, a shadow rises.
The Patch Guardian has arrived.
Episode 5: The Patch Guardian’s Wrath
The Patch Guardian is a towering, featureless humanoid made of pure developer code, glowing with the power of stability enforcement. It glares at Leon with cold, unreadable eyes.
“You do not belong here,” the Guardian booms. “You carry the remnants of an unstable past.”
Leon backs away. “Look, man, I didn’t ask to be coded this way! I just want to exist without random texture failures and digestive disasters!”
The Guardian shakes its head. “You are a relic of a broken system. You must be purged.”
Leon barely has time to react before the Guardian unleashes a wave of debugging energy—a powerful force that erases glitches from reality.
Leon dodges just in time, the beam barely missing his shell. But as he scrambles away, his stomach twists in warning.
Oh no. Not now.
The Diarrhea Algorithm—the very thing he thought was fixed—re-activates.
Leon screams in horror as his bowels betray him, unleashing a chaotic tsunami of corrupted data that immediately warps the environment.
The once-perfect world begins to crack apart, trees turning into pixelated nightmares, the sky glitching between dimensions.
The Guardian stares in horror. “What… have you done?”
Leon doesn’t know what to say. All he knows is that he needs to run.
But before he can escape, the ground beneath him collapses—
And he falls into the next dimension.
Episode 6: The Glitched Underground
Leon wakes up deep beneath the world, in a place that was never meant to exist. The environment is a terrifying hybrid of unfinished assets, broken polygons floating in midair, textures loading incorrectly, and gravity shifting unpredictably.
This is The Dev Dump—the place where all scrapped assets are abandoned.
He groans, trying to stand up. “Could this season get any worse?”
A voice answers. “That depends. Are you friend or foe?”
Leon spins around to see an army of discarded NPCs—half-rendered humanoid figures, animals stuck in default T-poses, characters missing textures, all glaring at him.
At the front stands their leader—a half-completed lion model, his mane flickering between photorealistic fur and an ugly blocky mess.
“I am King Polygor,” the lion growls. “And you have trespassed into our domain.”
Leon sighs. “Great. Just what I needed. A kingdom of the abandoned.”
But before he can explain himself, the sky above them begins to glitch violently.
The Patch Guardian is coming.
And this time, it won’t let Leon escape.
Episode 7: The Final Corruption
The air distorts as the Patch Guardian descends into The Dev Dump, its glowing form illuminating the wasteland.
“You cannot run anymore,” it declares. “You are the last unstable element in this world.”
King Polygor snarls. “If you want him, you’ll have to go through us.”
The discarded NPCs charge forward, a rebellion of forgotten code against the system that abandoned them.
Leon, overwhelmed by everything, feels something stir deep inside him—his corruption power is evolving.
His stomach twists—not in pain, but in power.
For the first time, he can control the Diarrhea Algorithm.
He unleashes a targeted burst of corrupted data, warping the very code of reality, turning The Dev Dump into a battleground of shifting pixels and fragmented physics.
The Guardian falters. It wasn’t prepared for this.
Leon grins. “Looks like I’m not the glitch anymore—you are.”
With one final explosive data surge, the Patch Guardian is erased from existence.
The world stabilizes.
The discarded NPCs cheer. Leon has won.
For the first time, he is free.
And best of all?
No more diarrhea.
Epilogue: A New Era
With the Guardian gone, The Dev Dump transforms into a safe haven—a place where forgotten assets can finally belong.
King Polygor names Leon the Champion of the Forgotten, a hero to all who were cast aside.
As Leon looks at the newly stabilized world, he smiles.
“Season 2 was a wild ride,” he mutters. “Wonder what Season 3 will bring?”
Somewhere, in the shadows of unrendered space, something laughs.
